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Focus on quality, not quantity. Unfortunately, many guys try to message a bunch of girls, instead of just the ones who are the best matches. Girls see through this.
How to Write a Great First Message
We get so many First message online dating tips those lazy mass-messages that we just ignore them. Look for girls with common interests, shared beliefs, and similar goals. Those girls are much more likely to respond to you because you are a good fit. And a girl like that will appreciate that you took the time to read her profile, notice what you have in common, and ask her questions about those things, creating a solid connection. Compliment common interests and personality — not looks. Girls are tired of getting messages from guys who compliment our looks, but have nothing to say about the rest of our profiles. Those messages are shallow and meaningless — the online equivalent of getting dry-humped by douche bags in a club.
Like this first message example: This is a great message for three reasons: This is excellent because Miles: I never reply to these messages because they bug the shit out of me. A great first message jumps past pointless questions and right into specific questions. You could easily lead by asking her the question: To achieve this, you have to ask her questions. The questions are the gas. As a rule of thumb, ask one or two questions. For instance if you find you both love dogs, you could send a message like this: Inspire A Craving Note: Certain words are attention grabbing because they sound delicious. Notice how it starts off with a light compliment.
Complimenting her will often give you points, but only if you focus on intangible qualities like intelligence or her accomplishments. Paying her a more meaningful compliment is a breath of fresh air for her. Mentioning something yummy-sounding works just as well on dating apps. In fact, it literally stimulates your brain and makes you feel good. And the better she feels about talking to you, the more likely she is to share her number. The example above is more suited for a dating site where longer messages are the norm, but you can get her talking about herself on a dating app with a short message like this: They instantly pique her curiosity.
They set you apart from the crowd. They ask her a question.
You need to make it as easy as possible for her to respond, and controlling the conversation is a simple way to do it. Those three elements are crucial if you want to get a response to your online dating opener. Send her a light-hearted follow up message like this one: The more messages you send, the more desperate you look. Women are too smart to fall for them. Not only do copy and paste messages workbut we get incredible results for our clients with them. Other industry experts recognize the wisdom of the copy and paste method as well. And even if a woman calls you out on sending a template message, so what? And many intelligent women recognize the wisdom of using them, like this one who weighed in on a Quora forum discussion: